Preparing for the Spanking Parties **NEW

Party Preparation.

Friday 12th May 2017

Ladies Day. An afternoon of Femdom. Birmingham


A lot of people over the years have asked me how I prepare for the spanking parties. I would like to say that I spend hours luxuriating in the bath with a bottle of champagne a good book and then jump out, shake myself dry and get right to the party….. but unfortunately it isn’t like that.

Normally its messy, with non stop phone calls, last minute changes, trying to get more girls is we have more guys that expected… or trying to get different girls if one of the advertised girls falls ill.

Drama drama drama. Add in to the mix the parties where I need to order different costumes and you have a real headache on your hands.

My friend Michael and myself decided to take photographs of some of the more unusual tasks of preparing for a Femdom School themed party…..


st 1

I should mention that it was little short of a miracle that the party did actually take place. The party had been planned for agessssss… and disaster struck three days before on Tuesday.

About a month before the party I was contacted by a porn company who wanted to do a shoot on Tuesday. No problem so far right?
So I schlepped all the way to Godforsaken Hemel Hempstead. Everything was going normal… or as normal as can be expected when you are having sex with someone you have known for all of 5 minutes when IT happened. 


My jaw made a funny noise and I started screaming. I was in AGONY, and I mean agony. I thought it was going to be a 9-9-9 and blues and twos jobby. Ohhhhh myyyy God.

But all the praying helped. The prayers to Jesus, Allah, Vishnu, Obi Wan Kenobi and the Viking God of Jaws WORKED… well, that and about 20 different painkillers.

…… I always knew there was a reason I didn’t like Hemel Bastard Hempstead.


Back to what I was saying……….


It was 1am on the morning of the party – Friday 12th May 2017 – and, though I had planned to make the blackboard many moons ago, for various reasons I got side tracked and it got left to the last minute.

I knew I wanted a very large blackboard, and had bid on some on eBay. I kept getting outbid, time and time again, alternatively the others I had my eye on were too far away to go and collect.

st 2   On goes the primer.

I brought some specialist Blackboard paint from B and Q, and thanks for our new friend Ben,  who said he had painted a blackboard before {why? – is he a Headmaster, does he attend school-themed spanking parties?? is this a new recruit for the Stinging Tails Spanking Parties???} suggested I put a coat of primer on first of all.

(Ben, if you are reading this, you are more than welcome to come along for a good hiding!)

st 3 Arthur ensuring I get all the edges.

I had a spare piece of wood lying around from one of my previous DIY endeavours. As anyone who knows me will know, I have a habit of getting more paint on myself than on the walls…. etc. Under Michael’s guidance, he suggested I put newspaper down on the floor first.
Already we are off to a better start than if I did it alone.

By now its 1.30 am and I am sooooo tired. I am struggling to keep my eyes open.

st 4

As well as taking these photographs. Michael helped by giving instruction, and threatening to spank me if I got too much paint on the floor.

st 5

Next its bedtime!

I had set my alarm for 5am, but I was tooo tired to wake up.

I finally woke up at 7am, and first order of the day – after feeding the cats – was painting the blackboard. This is very important as the other mistresses and myself needed to list all the demerits of the naughty boys throughout the Femdom party.
These include: rudeness, insolence, looking at us in a provocative or disrespectful manner, trying to touch miss’s bottom or legs, not responding well to a spanking, general disruption, not getting full marks on the school examinations, not wearing correct school uniforom…. and so on.

st 6 Almost ready!

I can’t stop yawning.

I put another coat of Blackboard paint on, as our new friend Ben suggested.

Next task was general tidying. Me and Henry Hoover, Colin the Dust Cloth and Carmela the Carpet Washer had another morning dalliance.
Next I had to do some cooking so that the starters were ready for the guests when they arrived. I would have taken photos of the kitchen, but as every surface was jam packed with food, half baked mixtures, and copious amounts of alcohol I decided not to take a photograph. It looks very messy.

We also have a Birthday cake that needs the candles put on!

st 7 Last little bit!!

I always believe that having too much food is better than not enough, and as we oftentimes have people come last minute, I always ensure there is more than enough. We could feed the five thousand. As a vegetarian it can be a bit difficult cooking meat correctly, as I can’t taste it to check. Here is where Michael proves invaluable.

As I am cooking and cleaning, there is always a deluge of phone calls, ranging from people asking my address, the girls asking what the wear etc etc. The worst part is when I get ‘URGENT’ calls or emails from my vanilla {a.k.a. proper} job and I have to get my laptop out…. whilst my hands covered in cooking oil and the like…..
My cats always want fuss when I am doing all this. It’s difficult doing 100 things at once, but as of yet, I have never burnt any food at a party!

st 8 I made this!!!

The blackboard is quite a lot heavier than I originally thought, so I don’t think we can hang this on the wall. I’d hate for it to fall on one of the guests!!

But before anyone else comes through the door I need to spend some time preparing the exams – English, History and Geography. The exam questions will be read out by Mistress T, Mistress Penelope Cane and myself.
Just like the blackboard, this is just another job that I have left till the very last minute. Out comes the pens and paper as I make the exams.


Before the party I always have hundreds of bits of paper lying around with lists of things to do… and all hell breaks loose when I misplace one of my lists. Breathe Breathe Breathe.

Michael has to make me two Coffee Martinis to wake me up after all the cleaning and cooking.

st 9

Normally I do all the prep for the party by myself, but as it happens I have Michael here today so he is here to help me with the heavy tasks. This includes moving all the normal furniture to one side and helping me carry in the school desks from the Utility room. How I came to have the school desks is another strange but story for another time….

Moving the desks is no easy feat, as we have to move everyhing off of the desks… all my work tooks. This includes chain saws, jigsaws, tree saws, regular saws {I better stop with all this talk of saws, incase anyone become scared of me…..} hammers, lawn movers, hundreds of pots of paint, spanners, screw drivers and things I didn’t even know I had…….

st 10 School desks!

With that done its now time to prepare all the spanking implements and place some on the desks to incentivise the students! Learning is very important.

Then I jump in the shower and get dressed….. Let the party begin.
I must put my make up on or I’ll scare all the guests away.

You probably wouldn’t believe this, but there is very little difference between actual teaching and teaching at a spanking party. When Mistress T and Mistress Penelope Cane arrive, we spend a bit of time going over our lesson plan, and give lots of importance to the types of behaviour we will not tolerate in the classroom. We also have to prepare for the naughty pupils trying to take over.
It definitely helps having a selection of school-themed spanking implements.

implement 8
House of Eros spanking ruler strap.

Everything is going exactly to plan, Mistress T tells me that she has had a rather stressful week and needs to take her frustration out somehow. Add this to some of the torture techniques I have learnt whilst reading a book on North Korea. The book is called A Kim Jong-Il Production by Paul Fischer, 2015. Yes, I am almost done reading this book and it has been an excellent read. I chose it as one of my birthday presents, as anyone who knows me knows that whilst I am not a communist sympathiser, I read a lot of books on North Korea, Kin Jong – UN, Cuba, Kim Jong-Il, and other communist dictatorships.

I can tell you the last place I want to be is in a North Korean Slammer, that’s for sure. Give me 12 of the hardest cane any day of the week!


One of the attendees, and one of my good friends had a birthday that day, so it’s cake time. We always have a big birthday cake when it’s people’s birthdays!

The cake is always followed by the caning round…. and then the crying round.

st 11

After the party when everyone has gone home – or on the occasions that people decide to sleep over – I always feel absolutely exhausted. Being spanked at the female-submissive parties is no less exhausting than doing the spanking at the femdom parties. As I am an achy old lady, everything hurts. My head hurts, my face hurts, my arms hurt, my wrists hurt, my legs hurt, my eyes hurt, my voice goes…. What better excuse for Prosecco – time, Cava o’clock, Sauvingnon Blank time, Pinot o’clock and Cocktail time.

Yes, one of the better parts of the spanking party is the After Spanking Party Party, which is a very small and select after party with a few people, dance music, edible body oil and endless amounts of alcohol, which begins after everyone else is waved off and on their way back to their significant others.

We can’t put the pictures for that party on here as they’re a bit PG13 for your humble viewer, but lets just say it gets a little bit wild, clothes are normally discarded and I have been known to get out my floor to ceiling pole…. for pole dancing.

I’m suddenly not so tired anymore.


The washing up is always left till the next day… thank God for dishwashers.